Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris doesn’t call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
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Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that’s why there are no signs of life.
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Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
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There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
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Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
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Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen. Seconds.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow
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Chuck Norris can give aspirin a headache
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
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Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
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Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
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Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.
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Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
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Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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Chuck can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
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Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
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Chuck Norris can speak braille.
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Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon
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Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
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Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
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Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
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Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
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If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.